


We Need You

by The_Optimist



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Angst, Death, M/M, Multi, Spoilers, Suicide, Triggers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-13
Updated: 2014-12-13
Packaged: 2018-03-01 08:27:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,098
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2766359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Optimist/pseuds/The_Optimist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gavin's been thinking, which is always a bad thing. But now he's thinking about ending it all. Maybe his boys have been too harsh this time. Maybe the young Brit was just a bit more fragile than they thought... and maybe a bit more insane too.</p>
            </blockquote>





	We Need You

**Author's Note:**

> This is very triggering, or has the potential to be. If this could affect you, I am advising you not to read this and go fill up on fluff instead. Or ice-cream. Ice-cream is good.

They didn't notice when it began, the drinking. Of course, all of them but Ray drank, but never like this. Gavin needed a break from life. He loved his boys, he really did, but he felt like he was hurting them.

Michael constantly joked about hating him, but it's hard to take it as a joke when it's being screamed in your ears, in your face.

Gavin knew that Jack loved him, well he used to be certain of it. Now it just felt like he was a lost puppy being guided by a wolf.

Geoff used to kiss him after every heist. But now he pulled away from Gavin in their doorway, heading for his room instead. Jack and sometimes Ryan would follow, but Gavin felt like maybe the gents were trying to avoid him, and it hurt.

Ray had been close to him, but now he always seemed busy, with Michael, with Ryan, with his guns, God damnit! Gavin was scared that maybe these things _were_ more important than him. That it had been a mistake on the part of the others to introduce him to the beautiful relationship.

And that's where Ryan had stepped in. The creepy murderer, with a heart bursting with love for his boys. The mask he wore had taught him to see through other's, and he saw Gavin's pain.

The gent had comforted the boy, who insisted he not tell anyone else his fears. Ryan agreed, because he thought Gavin knew they were unfounded, untrue, wrong. But after Gavin called off the comfort sessions, Ryan thought Gavin was getting better. He would still hold him close most nights, and whisper comforting words, but his attention was soon drawn away by the others, who asked for Ryan's attention that he had been keeping solely for Gavin.

Gavin, his last hope at being loved was almost ignoring him, and the others encouraged him too. Like they were teaming up on him, and oh how much that hurt the young Brit, who had never loved as much as he did now, and had never wished he had never been as born as much as he did these last few months.

So it was no surprise that when one night Gavin came back to the boys shared apartment, drunk almost to the point of passing out, and climbed up the stairs, jumping off and just managing to catch the chandelier.

Jack and Ryan rushed in just in time to catch him as he fell from the hanging light he had been swinging on. The blonde had giggle hysterically, and the older men mistook his tears of pain for those of insane laughter.

They cared for him that night, but he was too far away in his pain and drunkness to notice. When just a few days later, he attempted to drink from Geoff's liquor cabinet, he had been shouted at by the usually calm man.

He was beginning to think this pain was unbearable, that maybe the boys really didn't love him as much as he loved them, that maybe he was just a stupid kid with a cute accent that they had felt sorry for.

He began to blame himself when his boys were less than kind to him. He berated himself, telling himself that if only he had been better, if only he had spoke clearer, if only he was less stupid...

He drank more and more, attempting to drown out his troubled thoughts. He worked more, did more of Geoff's work, then Jack's work, then Ryan's...

Gavin tried to be as helpful as possible, but Michael still said he hated him, Ray still didn't have time for him, Jack still treated him like an idiot, Geoff seemed to only get angry at him, and Ryan just didn't seem to care anymore. So while the boys where playing their Xboxs, he called out that he was leaving to get groceries. It was dark, the sun only a few hours away, and Gavin was slightly tipsy, but there were a few noises of agreement, and then Gavin was gone.

He made his way through the streets, before carefully making his way up a building to the roof a few blocks away from his apartment.

He looked at the penthouse suite he lived in, the rising sun turning the windows a bright yellow, and listened to the familiar sound of sirens racing through the city. With a sigh, he closed his eyes, and took a deep breath. He wanted to say goodbye.

He pulled his phone out his pocket, and began to cry as he saw no new messages or phone calls. It was his breaking point. They didn't care anymore, or maybe they had never cared...

He dialled Ryan's number, as it was the most recently used one. The phone rang six times before his boyfriend answered it.

"Gavin? Where Are you, I thought you were with us." Gavin took a shuddering breath, before speaking, his voice cracking as he did.

"I'm sorry Ryan. I love you, I love you all, I really do. I just..." He sobbed, and instantly Ryan was on alert.

"Gavin?! Where the fuck are you?! Are you okay?! We're going to come get you, just hang on buddy."

" **NO**!" Gavin screamed, voice breaking. "Please, I don't want you to see this. I'm sorry, I'm selfish, but I just wanted to say goodbye. I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry, I'm sorry..."

Ryan was silent for a few seconds. When he spoke, his voice was ice calm with anger and fear. "Gavin. You better not be doing what I think you are. Gavin? Do you hear me! You are **NOT** doing this to us! Don't you dare! Don't you fucking dare!" Ryan screamed at him, his voice cracking at the end.

"I've got his location." Came Jack's faint voice through the line.

"I can see him!" Came Ray's squeaky voice, and he stared at the penthouse window, seeing five faces pressed there. He took a step up onto the edge of the roof.

" **GAVIN NO**!" Came Michael's scream, overpowering everyone else's protests.

"I'm sorry I hurt you. I'm sorry I'm stupid. I'm sorry I'm an idiot. I'm sorry for making you hate me." He sobbed. "But I'm fixing it, I'm always fixing it."

" **GAVIN** -!" The cries of his name where cut off as he threw the phone onto the roof behind him. He looked up at his boyfriends, their angry, shocked and terrified faces stared back at him, screaming words he would never hear.

Gavin closed his eyes.

And he flew.


End file.
